It’s a very hard thing to come up with good qualities about yourself when you’re put on the spot. When I was asked to list some positives about myself last week I sort of froze and sheepily said, “I have a good sense of humor” and “I’m a hard worker” (There was probably a minute of silence in between those two things). It’s not that I don’t think I have good qualities- I know I do. It’s just too awkward to actually admit them to yourself because it’s not a social norm. I tried to say other things but would then say, “but….” To negate the fact that I just said something nice about myself (how dare I!).But lately I’ve been lacking confidence so I have to sit myself down and tell myself really nice things without contingencies.
So over the last few days I’ve been trying to think of more qualities and asked my husband what he thought. Here is my list:
-I have a good sense of humor
-I’m a hard worker
-I have a solid sense of self
-I am being proactive in helping my anxiety
-I am going back to school and doing well
-I am thoughtful
– I don’t give up
-I like to make other laugh and be happy
-I am open-minded
-I understand of other people and cultures
-I am even tempered (mostly)
-I have surrounded myself with great people in my life
-I appreciate the little things
-I am strong and independent
It’s a list that’s in progress and I’m working on it. It seems so small that saying these things to myself would actually help. But for the last week I’ve been working on this and I do feel like it is helping in little ways.
So, to my fellow anxiety ridden friends: What are your good qualities (no ‘buts’ included)?
Alex 